Most Popular
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Barack Obama and Me
It was the year 2000 and I was a young hungry reporter in Chicago covering a young hungry state legislator
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A Prison Cover-up During Hurricane Rita
For days after the storm, inmates in Beaumont lived without A/C, electricity or hot meals. Press releases kept saying everything inside was fine. Guards and prisoners agree — that was nothing but B.S.
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Little Bitty Burger Barn
"It's okay to be little bitty in the big city" is an apt slogan for this new burger joint, where sliders rule
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Live-Action Role-Players Get Boffed in Amtgard
Amid flailing swords and flying shields, these modern-day knights fight on
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Houston St. Patrick's Day Guide
Our guide to going green for St. Paddy's
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Barack Obama and Me (254)
It was the year 2000 and I was a young hungry reporter in Chicago covering a young hungry state legislator
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A Prison Cover-up During Hurricane Rita (22)
For days after the storm, inmates in Beaumont lived without A/C, electricity or hot meals. Press releases kept saying everything inside was fine. Guards and prisoners agree — that was nothing but B.S.
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Are You Hot Enough for Citizen Lounge? (7)
All This Useless Beauty
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What's the Problem Houston? (5)
The city's skuzzy alt-rock scene thinks it is dying
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Live-Action Role-Players Get Boffed in Amtgard (5)
Amid flailing swords and flying shields, these modern-day knights fight on
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Margot at the Wedding, American Gangster: Unrated Extended Edition, Lust, Caution, Excellent Cadavers
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Hell Yes: Devil May Cry 4
Dante's inferno rages on
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It's Always Dead at The Club
Yet another clumsy first person shooter
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Justice League: The New Frontier, The Darjeeling Limited, Death at a Funeral, Beowulf: Director's Cut
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Our top DVD picks scheduled for release this week
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You Know What I Don’t Understand? Andy Rooney
06:17AM 03/14/08 -
SXSW: Flatstock in photos
09:27PM 03/15/08 -
Woody Williams Stats Not So Solid
03:48PM 03/14/08 -
Jameson’s Rarest Vintage Reserve at $250 a Bottle
12:20PM 03/11/08
What we are writing about
- American Gangster
- Amy Sillman: Suitors...
- birth defects
- Bob Dylan
- Christmas Tree-O
- Continental Club
- Houston art
- Houston local music
- Houston music stores
- Houston Rockets
- Houston theater
- I'm Not There
- illegal immigrants
- Main Street Theater
- McGonigel's Mucky Duck
- Meridian
- Perspectives 158:...
- players' scoring averages
- Proletariat
- Rudyard's
- Rumors
- Sig's Lagoon
- Somerville
- Sound Exchange
- toxic industrial...
- Toyota Center
- Turkeys of the Year
- Verizon Wireless Theater
- Warehouse Live
- Wii
Recent Articles By Robert Wilonsky
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Stardust
Matthew Vaughn hacks at Neil Gaiman's fantasy wonderland
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Elvis Is Everywhere
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Fuzz Busters
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No Reservations
No Reservations is sweet and savory fare. Without the foam
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Chow Time Again
Recent Articles By Jordan Harper
National Features
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Phoenix New Times
Canine Crusaders
That drug-sniffing dog up ahead? He may not be your best friend.
By Ray Stern -
Broward-Palm Beach New Times
The Muscle Men
Thanks to a string of Florida "anti-aging clinics," baseball's steroid scandal isn't limited to superstars.
By Michael J. Mooney -
Miami New Times
Picked On
Farm workers earn nada in America's green-bean capital.
By Janine Zeitlin -
Village Voice
"Why I'm No Longer a Brain-Dead Liberal"
An election-season essay from one of America's greatest playwrights.
By David Mamet
The Bourne Ultimatum, December Boys, Interview, Undead or Alive
By Robert Wilonsky and Jordan Harper
Published: December 13, 2007
The Bourne Ultimatum
(Universal)
The final installment in the Bourne-again trilogy is the one in which the CIA assassin's true identity is revealed. It's the origin story in reverse — how brilliant. But solving the mystery (and misery, as Jason Bourne's among the most tormented action heroes of all time) is only half the kick. Paul Greengrass, back for his second Bourne picture, makes the most sprawling yet intricately intimate action movies in cinema history — globe-trotters welcome, but claustrophobics need not sign up. As befitting a film in which you're constantly asking, "How'd they do that?" there are copious mini-docs on everything from shooting on location (from Berlin to N.Y.C.) to Matt Damon's behind-the-wheel chops to the rooftop chase sequence in Tangier. And the deleted scenes suggest Greengrass excised the political to make it more, ya know, personal. — Robert Wilonsky
December Boys
(Warner Bros.)
Hogwarts alums get to pick from two pics this week: Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix or this teensy-tiny imported indie in which Harry Potter (which is to say, Daniel Radcliffe) loses his virginity in a hippie chick's cave (an actual cave, mind you; no metaphors here). Radcliffe plays the oldest of four Aussie orphans sent to spend a summertime Christmas on idyllic shores owned by a kindly couple; all the kiddos, save for Radcliffe's Maps, want to be adopted — especially wee Misty, who narrates the film from middle age. And while the whole thing's terribly twee and predictable, down to the waving of Maps's wand by cutie-pie Lucy (Teresa Palmer), December Boys is also win-you-over charming — a standard coming-of-age tale told with great conviction and sincerity. It ain't magical, but it'll do. — Wilonsky
Interview
(Sony)
Two assholes sit at a table. One's a pompous asshole journalist, the other an entitled asshole starlet. They draw lines in the asshole sand and yell asshole things at each other. Cowritten and directed by Steve Buscemi (who also plays one of the assholes), Interview is a remake of a movie by Dutch filmmaker Theo van Gogh, who was later murdered by Muslim fundamentalist assholes. It's surprisingly fun watching Buscemi and Sienna Miller be assholes to each other, at least for the first hour or so. Then again, potent performances and writing can't stop one from tiring of being the silent third member of a gigantic assholefest. But Buscemi slowly reveals the people inside the assholes (so to speak), creating something richer than, say, a Neil LaBute 100 percent asshole bonanza. — Jordan Harper
Undead or Alive
(Image)
Stop me when it gets too painful: This western zombie comedy stars Desperate Housewives hunk James Denton and SNL alum Chris Kattan as bumbling cowboys fleeing a posse of the undead, courtesy of a curse laid on them by Geronimo, whose buckskin-clad babe of a niece travels with our heroes, lecturing them about the sins of Western civilization and sparking a romance with Kattan that's just a tad less believable than the zombie parts. It's all so very bad, a failure even as the type of unintentional camp beloved by bad-cinema aficionados. Written and directed by a former South Park writer, the movie wants to be the kind of awesomely carefree crap of Trey Parker and Matt Stone's Cannibal! The Musical, but it's nothing more than unremarkable, which of course is the greatest sin that a cowboy zombie comedy can commit. — Harper










