Most Popular
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Barack Obama and Me
It was the year 2000 and I was a young hungry reporter in Chicago covering a young hungry state legislator
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Mescaline on the Mexican Border
Texas is the only state in the country where peyote is sold legally. Really.
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A Prison Cover-up During Hurricane Rita
For days after the storm, inmates in Beaumont lived without A/C, electricity or hot meals. Press releases kept saying everything inside was fine. Guards and prisoners agree — that was nothing but B.S.
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Little Bitty Burger Barn
"It's okay to be little bitty in the big city" is an apt slogan for this new burger joint, where sliders rule
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Ghost Town CFS: Carriage House Cafe
Step back in time to a spooky old carriage barn with a monster chicken-fried steak
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Barack Obama and Me (251)
It was the year 2000 and I was a young hungry reporter in Chicago covering a young hungry state legislator
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Save Lobo: A Siberian Husky Mix is Sentenced to Die (28)
Why? Because he's big and intimidating and because one family complained about him over and over again
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A Prison Cover-up During Hurricane Rita (15)
For days after the storm, inmates in Beaumont lived without A/C, electricity or hot meals. Press releases kept saying everything inside was fine. Guards and prisoners agree — that was nothing but B.S.
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Are You Hot Enough for Citizen Lounge? (7)
All This Useless Beauty
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Rotten to the Corps: A Question of Justice at Texas A&M (140)
Thanks to A& M and a district attorney, two cadets escape punishment for beating in a student's face
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No Reservations, I Could Never Be Your Woman, In the Shadow of the Moon, The Independent
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Margot at the Wedding, American Gangster: Unrated Extended Edition, Lust, Caution, Excellent Cadavers
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Hell Yes: Devil May Cry 4
Dante's inferno rages on
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It's Always Dead at The Club
Yet another clumsy first person shooter
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Justice League: The New Frontier, The Darjeeling Limited, Death at a Funeral, Beowulf: Director's Cut
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Over the Weekend: Fotos, Dogs and Sausage. And Hannah Montana Too.
08:50AM 03/10/08 -
Friday Night: Wilco at Verizon Wireless Theater
05:04PM 03/10/08 -
Spring Training Doesn’t Count, Except for When It Does
04:29PM 03/10/08 -
Sausage Fest: Bangers and Mash at Red Lion Pub
11:40AM 03/08/08
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Recent Articles By Robert Wilonsky
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Stardust
Matthew Vaughn hacks at Neil Gaiman's fantasy wonderland
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Elvis Is Everywhere
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Fuzz Busters
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No Reservations
No Reservations is sweet and savory fare. Without the foam
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Chow Time Again
Recent Articles By Jordan Harper
Recent Articles By Jim Ridley
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Black Sheep
Ewe better watch out (and other puns)
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Interview
In Steve Buscemi's latest, the journalist-star sit-down is an interview between vampires
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Chow Time Again
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Cold War Reheated
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When He Was Small
National Features
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SF Weekly
The Candidate
Our columnist knows Ralph Nader's running mate all too well.
By Matt Smith -
The Pitch
How Not To Be a Rap Star
First of all, lay off the Ecstasy.
By Nadia Pflaum -
Village Voice
Project Runaway
What becomes a gossip columnist most?
By Michael Musto
No Reservations, I Could Never Be Your Woman, In the Shadow of the Moon, The Independent
By Robert Wilonsky , Jordan Harper , and Jim Ridley
Published: February 14, 2008
No Reservations
(Warner Bros.)
From its cheap, mid-'90s-looking package to its woefully scant extras (one pre-chewed Food Network behind-the-scenes, blech) to its wide-screen/full-screen option, this feels like something dropped right into the discount bins; it probably debuts at half off this week. And this soufflé of a romantic comedy deserves better: Catherine Zeta-Jones and Aaron Eckhart, as warring chefs reheating 2001's Mostly Martha with director Scott Hicks, keep things smart, light and tight amid a story that coulda been penned on the back of a recipe card. Zeta-Jones is the neurotic chef tethered to her dead sister's daughter (Abigail Breslin, mopey-cute); Eckhart's the square-jawed cook come to rescue them both. Formula, yes, but it works, given the good ingredients well prepared — and it lingers like light brunch, leaving plenty of room for something more filling. — Robert Wilonsky
I Could Never Be Your Woman
(Genius)
Shelved since 2005 allegedly because of tussles between moneymaker and moviemaker, this dreary romantic comedy from Clueless writer-director Amy Heckerling is unreleasable for any and every reason — even straight to home video. It plays like 97 minutes' worth of deleted scenes, beginning with Tracey Ullman's rambling monologue as muse and Mother Nature, oh brother. Then it's on to the plot, which involves an "older" TV teen-dramedy producer (Michelle Pfeiffer) falling for a "younger" actor (Paul Rudd, wasted as "the next Ben Stiller"). Both actors overplay their parts in a desperate attempt to fill in the underwritten screenplay, full of pop-culture references clipped out of a yellowed Entertainment Weekly. Heckerling drones and groans through her bitter commentary. Embarrassing except maybe for Atonement's Oscar-nominated Saoirse Ronan, whose debut has been released right to a shelf. — Wilonsky
In the Shadow of the Moon
(THINKFilm)
For any stargazer, then or now, David Sington's reverent documentary about the Apollo space program is a must-see: an engrossing oral history of the space race, recounted with zest by the astronauts themselves and studded with archival NASA footage that trumps 2001 for sci-fi astonishment. What the DVD loses in the big-screen splendor of those celestial vistas, it gains in special features — specifically, more than an hour of deleted and extended scenes filled with wonders. See rocket jockeys trail from tethers as the Earth recedes lazily in the background, watch as Neil Armstrong coolly radios NASA from a capsule tumbling end over end through the cosmos, and hear the astronauts testify to "the dark side of Apollo" — the toll the pursuit of heaven took on life back on Earth. — Jim Ridley
The Independent
(Allumination)
This mockumentary about an independent filmmaker has three jokes that it repeats endlessly, to varying effect. The celebrity cameos — mostly by real indie directors like Roger Corman and Peter Bogdanovich — fall flat. Jerry Stiller, as the titular director, plays that same guy he's played for the last 20 years, which means lots of yelling and about 50 percent hilarious. But the glimpses we see of the films created by Stiller's character deliver the goods. With titles like The Foxy Chocolate Robot and plots about Siamese twins drafted into 'Nam, they amount to brilliant comedy sketches squashed down to a minute each. Of course, the rest of The Independent can't compare. And it doesn't help that, in the seven years since the film was made, mockumentaries went from being a tired concept to a dead one. — Jordan Harper









